Let's Give Wolverine and Spider-Man a Break

There is a criticism of two characters in the Marvel Universe that has become so tired and worn, I’m truly shocked when I hear comic book fans still yammering on about it. That is, Wolverine and Spider-Man’s ability to manage the time to be members of so many super teams.

It isn’t possible!

How could they be in two places at once?

When do they sleep?

I’ll address all of the answers at once: it’s fiction. I was reading up on last week’s “Next Big Thing” press conference with Avengers writer Brian Michael Bendis and he discussed line-up changes. Invariably the criticism came up again on the message boards, as I assume it does anytime there is a roster update. Guys, give it a rest.

I'm sure fans loved that Logan and Peter spent three
years stuck in the past during  the course of
Astonishing Spider-Man and Wolverine.

First, I never hear the same widespread criticism of Batman, who has similarly been spread thin by leading the Outsiders while operating as a key member of the Justice League, all the while appearing in simultaneous adventures in books of his own. And he sure can’t get around as fast as Spidey.

But for whatever reason, people seem to have it out for Wolverine and Spider-Man. Since Bendis added the two characters to his Avengers line-up, people have just gone overboard with the criticism. But the books sell. They sell like hotcakes (which is a metaphor I’ve never quite understood, but I’m sticking with it).

Here’s the thing though—it doesn’t need to make sense at all. Because, while the Marvel U uses the real world as its backdrop, it ain’t the real world. So if Spider-Man and Wolverine want to join teams such as the Defenders, the Incredible Hulks or Cloak and Dagger, they can. It’s fictional.

But, if you really must have tackle the reality behind Logan and Peter’s innate ability to multi-task, take this into consideration: how much time does it really take to be on a super team? It doesn’t seem as though it’s a 40-hour a week job. Don’t you really just show up to punch stuff, attend a few round tables, and travel through time (which is a huge benefit in terms of keeping a schedule clear)? I've never seen Spider-Man stuck at a desk in Avengers Mansion kvetching to Jarvis about all of the overtime that comes with being one of Earth's Mightiest Heroes.

The Spider-Man/Wolverine Time Space Continuum debate has been repeated so often over the past seven years that it no longer holds any substance whatsoever (I don’t know that it ever did). I’m shocked if it gets any more passionate a response than “Yeah!!!” or “Totally!!!”

Let’s open the floor up for a real Avengers debate: would a super-powered couple really leave their newborn infant in the care of a giant rodent and at a residence that seems to be under attack every other week? Chew on that kids.