This is the Stuff of 'Legends'

"He asked who we are folks... one at a time please, one at a time."



I was listening to an older episode of Word Balloon last week and the conversation briefly turned to Legends, the 1986 post-Crisis mini-series that featured Darkseid and his minions versus the best and brightest of the DCU.

Perhaps the book is most famous for leading into The Justice League by writers Keith Giffen and J.M. DeMatteis with artist Kevin Maguire. Legends, however, was written by Len Wein and John Ostrander with art by the recently converted John Byrne, who famously rebooted Superman that same year.

A couple of things stuck out in my memory about this book. First, was that it didn’t have the zing I expected when I first read it. It was until after I purchased it that I realized that Byrne didn’t author the book—which at that point in my comic book reading hadn’t happened (that I could recall).

Seriously?

The other thing that struck me was that I was holding a book that featured the soon-to-be defunct Justice League of America. If there was one comic book that I would never have picked up a kid it was Detroit-version of the team. I, like Brad Meltzer, grew up on the Satellite League and these guys looked less fresh than what my peers were putting out in Dial “H” for Hero (Geez, I am dating myself).

But I’d never forgotten the closing pages of one of the issues (above), in which Cosmic Boy gets a beat down and finds himself at the feet of an unfamiliar cadre of heroes. “Who are you?” the Legionnaire asks. Turn page—it’s the Justice League of America-lite!

So put yourself in Cosmic Boy’s boots. He’s in the middle of a dicey fray and he asks who’s come to his rescue. What do all of the heroes do? They decide to introduce themselves one by one, in their own inimitable fashion:

“Name’s Vibe amigo!” A weak attempt at addressing Vibe’s clear Native American ethnicity.

“They call me the Elongated Man!” As he stretches his face away from Cosmic Boy.

“I’m Vixen!” Short and sweet—like her comic book career.

“J’onn J’onzz—the Martian Manhunter!” J’onn keeps it simple—this is who I am and this is what I do.

“I answer to Gypsy!” I dare you to introduce yourself this way at a party.

“My codename is Steel!” Were I Cosmic Boy, I would have replied “Oh that’s your codename? Sorry guys, can you start over? I wasn’t sure if you were giving me your proper names or code names!”

“And everybody’s favorite Nuclear Man makes it an uneven baker’s dozen!,” says Firestorm. “But for simplicity’s sake—just call us the Justice League of America!” Simplicity was forsaken by the time Ralph Dibny opened his mouth.

We don’t get enough of this expository charm in comic books anymore. I am hopeful that some of the DC Retroactive books coming this summer will also feature similarly clunky dialogue.

Well I hope you enjoyed this little trip down memory lane. If you’d like to hear more stories about my childhood comic book reading, just call me—I answer to Don!